Choices
by bionic4ever
Summary: CLYG4: Steve and Jaime spend some time alone to try and work things out after he and Oscar saw her kissing Sam. Can they still make it work?
1. Chapter 1

**Choices**

Chapter One

Jaime inhaled deeply, savoring the crisp mountain air. She looked back at the cabin; Steve wasn't up yet. Of course, it was only 5:00am, but Jaime loved watching the sun come up over the eastern mountains. This morning, she wished the sun would take its time. A difficult, probably painful conversation waited once the day had officially begun.

They'd arrived at the cabin the previous evening, right after her release from the hospital. For the first time since they'd resumed their relationship several months earlier, they'd spent a night under the same roof - in separate bedrooms. Neither of them knew if there was still a relationship to salvage, but they both hoped the love between them was still strong enough to weather the blow it had been dealt. They were here on Steve's suggestion that they spend some time alone together, to 'patch this up and make it float again'.

Jaime loved Steve now as much as she ever had, and she had no idea what had possessed her or why she'd been so drawn to Sam. Steve had seen them kissing, and not a 'friendship' kiss, either. Oscar had seen them doing a bit more than that and had talked to Steve about it, believing he already knew. She hadn't slept with Sam, but if she was honest with herself, Jaime had to admit that, with the spell (or temporary insanity) she'd been under, if she hadn't been in the hospital, she very well might've done that, too. But could - and should - she admit that to Steve? Trouble was, he'd want to know why, and Jaime had no answer for that. She had never been a cheater and had always believed faithfulness to be vital in any relationship. How could she explain something she had no answer for?

The drive up to the cabin had been quiet and tense. If there was still a chance for the two of them, neither one wanted to blow it. They'd shared a quick, mostly silent dinner, each one searching the other's face for any clue as to how this might turn out. They'd gone to their rooms early, to rest up for what was to come.

"Beautiful," Steve said as he sat down beside her. He couldn't remember ever feeling this tentative and awkward with Jaime.

"Yeah," she agreed, "I was afraid you'd missed it; it's the best part of the scenery up here."

"I meant you," he said softly. Was she trembling? "You cold?"

"No."

Steve moved closed, put an arm around her and felt her lean into him, just a little. He loved this woman more than life itself. "Jaime, I don't want to lose you. I don't want to lose us."

"Neither do I," she said, very quietly.

With his other hand, Steve reached over and tenderly brushed the hair from her face. She looked so sad. He took a deep breath. "In some ways, I feel like I already lost you, the first time you kissed Sam." His next words spilled out before he could stop them. "And whatever else you two did."

Jaime recoiled as though she'd been slapped, she pulled away from him and her eyes filled with tears. "Steve, I didn't sleep with him."

"From what Oscar saw, you might as well have." The hurt Steve felt was spewing out as anger and venom, and he didn't know why.

"What did Oscar tell you?" Jaime asked.

"I would hope, since you were there, you already know what happened."

"Aside from the fact that I was under heavy sedation - and pain meds - I'd like to know what he thinks he saw."

"He said it was about as far as you could've taken things fully clothed." Steve turned and kicked a large rock, shattering it to pieces. "Yeah, he took advantage of your being drugged, but you didn't try to stop him or even tell him 'no'. Apparently you were having an awfully good time." Jaime was speechless. Steve took a moment to calm down, and when he looked at her again, the pain in his eyes stabbed through Jaime's heart like a sword. "**_Why_**, Jaime?" he pleaded.

"I...don't know."

"Do you love him?"

"No!"

"But you have no idea why this happened?"

"I wish I did -"

"So do I," Steve told her. "I need to go for a walk." Jaime got up to join him but he stopped her. "I need to be alone right now. We didn't come up here to fight, but if I don't walk away for a little while, I think it might be World War Three." Steve could see the tears she'd been holding back beginning to cascade down her face, but he knew he'd only hurt her more at that moment if he stayed. With a heavy heart, he walked away, leaving Jaime to cry alone.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

Jaime sat by the little lake for a long time. The sun had risen high in the sky and begun its downward path in the west, and Steve still hadn't returned. Jaime feared he had gone for good. She wasn't sure what she'd have done if the roles were reversed. She feared she had killed something basic and necessary between them, and for what? A dumb, useless fling with a man she barely knew and liked even less. Her behavior was so out of character that she had stunned herself almost as much as Steve. She would fall to her knees and plead with Steve if it would help him decide to stay, but how could she ask his forgiveness when she couldn't forgive herself?

"Jaime?" His voice echoed the pain welling up in Jaime's heart. She ran to meet him and practically dove into his waiting arms. "Sweetheart, I'm so sorry; I should never have left you alone for the whole day. We were supposed to -"

"No," she interrupted, "you haven't done anything to be sorry for. I'm the one who did something so horrible...Steve, I love you so much, and I'm sorry I hurt you." Jaime wiped the tears from her eyes and tried to smile at him. "You are all that matters to me, and I will do anything - _anything_ - to prove that to you."

"You don't need to prove anything to me, Jaime."

"To myself, then. I know I've killed your trust in me, and I'm willing to start back at square one and earn it back, if you'll just give me the chance to -"

"Jaime..."

"I need you, Steve." Jaime swallowed hard, then went on. "But this decision is yours to make, and I'm ready to accept whatever you think is right."

"Sweetheart, when I was out walking, I realized something. Yes, we've been back together, but there was never any agreement or any kind of commitment between us, so you didn't do anything wrong. You were free to see anyone you wanted to see."

"You're making excuses for me again, and I don't deserve that," Jaime insisted.

"No, I'm not. It's not possible to break a commitment that isn't there. Our only tie to each other has been the past we shared together."

"That's a technicality -"

"Jaime, I want to change that. I don't want to own you or put you in chains, but I want to go back to us belonging only to each other. You just told me you're willing to accept whatever I decide? Well, what I've decided is that our lives have always been intertwined for a reason. We're supposed to be together, and...Jaime, let's get married."

"What?"

"Coming so close to losing you, I realized there is no one else in the world I can even imagine spending the rest of my life with. I love you with all my heart. Let's get married, now. Tonight."

Jaime kissed him, long and hard, drawing him closer than they'd been in a long time.

"Should I take that as your answer?" Steve asked, smiling broadly.

"Take it any way you want it, as long as you take me, too."

END


End file.
